2011 BMW 550i xDrive Gran Turismo Review

[ahmed_7erzon]

I'm guessing a few years ago, someone at BMW headquarters had a vision or a dream that foretold the complete demise of the station wagon and of the blinding hate for SUVs. This person (who had probably seen a Mercedes R-Class in a parking lot or used to work at Honda and got fired for designing the Crosstour) imagined a time and place where a vehicle with limited versatility, little appeal aesthetically and emotionally would become a highly sought-after commodity. This person may have been right; however, this is not the time nor is it the place.

The BMW 5-Series GT has been at the wrong end of a beating since it first saw the light as a concept at the 2009 Geneva Auto Show. That may be a little harsh, but the fact is that BMW's Progressive Activity Sedan (PAS) has or never will receive an award for outstanding design, most sought-after or most desirable anything.


It may have been destined for those looking for something new and original, like rich young cool folks but it hasn't happened. Fact is, BMW sold a trifling 223 (included in the 2,382 5-Series sold in 2010) in Canada during its first full year of availability. In January of 2011, BMW delivered 262 X5s. I don't call that success by any stretch of the imagination. As a side note, BMW wanted me to specify that only rear-drive versions were available until October. From then on, xDrive AWD models arrived and that they expect sales to pick up. We shall see...

The real sad part about the Gran Turismo's story is that, as a package, it all makes sense and it works.

If going on your way unnoticed is not what you want, then the GT will help. You'll get lots of looks but not admiring ones, just confused ones. You do have an ace in the hole if neighbours start pointing the finger at you. All you have to do point at the BMW logo: it's the beacon, the sign that you've done well for yourself. The styling could be the conversation starter if the matter persists.

Once you're done arguing over the blunt front end, awkward profile and “minivan does an SUV” rear end, have your new friend step inside the 5 GT. If he or she knows anything about class and elegance, they'll be smitten with the large, comfortable seats. If they should move rearward, they'll explore new definitions for huge second row and tonnes of legroom. They'll be unable to help themselves and will run their hands all over the cinnamon brown nappa leather, soft-touch plastics and other surfaces laden with rich textures.

You'll probably have to excuse the fact that the most important controls are located low in the centre console of the dashboard, which makes reading and selection difficult. You can detour their attention by inviting them to grab the fat, juicy steering wheel and having them imagine what it must be like cruising down the autobahn in this car. That'll get them to drool a little...


Once you've got their attention, show them the contents of the $5,000 Executive package: the rear-view camera, the ventilated front seats, the heads-up display, electric side sunshades, heated rear seats and the satellite radio. They're hooked now.

If you're feeling cocky, do take them for a spin. Say nothing. Start up the turbocharged 4.4L V8 and simply pull the funky-functional shifter into “D” and then let'er rip. Your passengers will think that they have been simultaneously kicked in the face and the ass. They'll wonder how such a huge beast can move this fast. Say only 400 hp and 8-speed automatic transmission.

That should be enough to shut them up for a few minutes. You could go on and add that it takes only 5.9 seconds to reach 100 km/h, that the motor generates 450 lb-ft of torque and that it's AWD. But why rub the salt in the wound with your words.

This person's dumbfounded expression will do nicely. The ultra-smooth drivetrain, tremendous power and unbelievably civil and quiet nature of the 2,240-kg (4,928-lb) road mammoth will numb his or her brain into mush. They'll wonder how one vehicle can behave in such polar-opposite ways; it rides as cozy and floaty as an early-90s Buick yet speeds up like a bullet.


Then, with a simple touch of your finger, you will turn your 550i GT into a highway bruiser. Using the button that controls suspension and throttle settings, you'll move from Comfort to Sport+ (skipping over Normal and Sport) and watch aggression levels climb. All this is part of the $3,900 Dynamic Handling package.

Kindly warning your passengers to hang on, you begin carving corners and accelerating from an apex like a champ. Here, they discover what front Active Seats do, as the bolsters actively hold them in place. You are, of course, in the middle of an industrial area on a Sunday morning where there is not a soul in sight...


Once you've returned to wherever you started from, you'll be able to proudly ask your riders’ opinion on your 550i GT is. They'll be blown away and sorry that they thought this was a lesser vehicle. As a final display of superiority, you walk around the back of the vehicle and show them the trick super-quick dual-mode power-operated hatch. Once show and tell is over, they'll walk away dreaming of owning a Gran Turismo.

Luckily for you, they won't have asked the price, which is of $90,100 as tested (base 550i GT retails for $79,900). Also, they'll have omitted to enquire about fuel consumption, which hovers around 14 L/100 km of premium stuff. As you think these numbers, your left eye twitches...

You will have done your job convincing others that the GT is cool, however deep down, you'll be longing for the gorgeous 5-Series wagon available in Europe. You know that had BMW kept the wagon here, that you would not have to take every neighbour for a ride, that all you'd get would be admiring glances and respectful nods.